I love PostSecret.  I love reading other people’s secrets & being able to identify with someone out there.  Even when they are completely anonymous.  I love when other people see secrets & think of me.

LibraryDiva saw that secret and mentioned it to me when I was blabbering on about the decision to leave law school.  And it’s so perfect.  I’d rather be happy doing “nothing” than to be unhappy, doing the wrong something.  The next couple of weeks might get annoying with answering questions about said decision but it’s so worth it.

I haven’t been this happy in a long time.

The plan is to take this next semester to really focus on writing.  I’m talking–hanging out in coffee shops with my laptop until they know me by name.

Also, LibraryDiva and I, with some other people at work, are doing this University-wide get-fit program.  It’s this whole big contest where you’re awarded points for working out and for going to different informational sessions.  It should be fun and it will hopefully keep me motivated for working out and eating right.

This year is looking up already.

Since it has been about two weeks since my last post, I’m going to go with a quick and easy list for today.

-Christmas was relaxing.  Visited my Aunt & Uncle.  Sat at home with the mother most of the day.

-Had December 25-Jan 3 off from work.  It was AMAZING.

-I was able to spend a couple of afternoons with myFavoriteMedStudent.  Was so great to see her!

-Went to my first [Ice] Hockey game.  It was awesome!

-Saw Where the Wild Things Are at the dollar theater and watched a bunch of movies at home.

-Saw my doctor for a follow up appointment.  My blood pressure went down.  Again.  It isn’t “dangerously” low yet but merely “abnormally” low.  Doc gave me a prescription for something that she hopes will help.  As all of the tests have come back normal, the only thing she came up with was maybe mono but even that, she said, should have shown up in the blood tests.  So tired and cranky I continue.

-New Year’s Eve was fun.  E., K., & I went downtown for “First Night.”  Got there around 4:30 and stayed until just after midnight.  There were a lot of different things going on.  Saw one of my favorite local bands perform, saw the University’s steel drum band perform… There was also a popular Beatles cover band–Hard Day’s Night and many other artists & activities.

-My New Year’s Resolutions are as follows:

  1. To have No Regrets.  This has been a sort of motto of mine for a while.  One of my favorite quotes is:  “Life is fleeting; better to make decisions that you enjoy now than to regret that you didn’t make them later.” -Bob Torres.  I have a couple of regrets from this past year, both of things that I did and things that I didn’t do.  I don’t want any regrets in 2010.
  2. To read 50 books this year.  This past year, with law school, was the first time in quite a few years that I haven’t met that goal.  I still managed to get about 45 books but that included a number of books that I re-read as well as several that I had to read for school.  So I guess this year, my goal will be to read 50 new books.
  3. To finish a novel.  Writing a novel, that is.  I’m working on something right now but I only have about 10,000 words.
  4. To make exercise a priority rather than a chore.

-Finally got my grades from the first semester.  Not thrilled with Contracts but satisfied with LARW.  That’s kind of how I expected it to go, though.

-This week is my last week of semi-freedom.  I’m back at work but classes don’t start until next Monday.  I need to start reading for Contracts soon, but I’m cherishing my last bits of sanity for now.

We all know and expect that some of our fellow law students are going to uh..how shall I say this?–completely lose it during finals.  Am I right?  It really is not a big surprise when it happens.  There are some people you just watch all semester, waiting in anticipation for them to have a break down.  I’m probably a terrible person for saying that.  But I can’t possibly be the only one who thinks this way.

Before you judge me, I’m not referring to those too-sweet people who simply crumble under the egos of the rest of the class…But rather, to the students who teeter on the brink of crazy for three months, studying non-stop, not taking care of themselves, and basically driving everyone else crazy.

Working in the law library, I see another side of some people.  One where, even more than normal, the perception is that “the world revolves around ME!  Why can’t everyone else see that?!?”  Don’t get me wrong, most of my classmates are great people.  The majority of them are polite and considerate in class as well as when they come to the circulation desk in the library–not only to me but to my coworkers and to our student assistants.  However.  The crazy students find it more difficult to disguise their true colors when under pressure.

Case in point.  Mr. Suave came up to the desk yesterday and looked around for our group study room sign-up sheet…

We have about ten rooms that students can check out to use for group study so as to not disturb the other students in the library.  We keep record of who has what room, at what time, when it is due back, and we also allow students to make reservations up to 24 hours in advance.

Now, Mr. Suave is not unattractive and my guess is that he has become accustomed to getting his way with a wink here or a flirty smile there.  He is really starting to press his luck with us, though.  There’s been a number of times when he has tried to convince us that we should make exceptions to the rules for him.  *eye roll*

So he was looking for the sign-up sheet.  By the way, I guess that isn’t the best way to describe it because it suggests that the students sign up for rooms themselves.  That is not the case.  We, at the circ desk, check out the rooms as they are available, and record the information for our own use as well as for statistics.  But somewhere along the line, some of the law students concluded that it is okay to reach across the desk, turn the clipboard around, and flip through the study room reservations.

Let me assure you, that is not okay.

Mr. Suave asked me where the sign-up sheet was.  I picked it up from beneath the counter, where I’ve been hiding it lately, and held it so that he could not see it.  He didn’t take the hint, and leaned over the counter anyway, peering to see the information.

“Can I help you?”  I asked him.

“Can I see the sheet?”  He asked.

“What are you looking for?”

“Can I see the sheet?” He repeated, annoyed.

“We don’t have any rooms available for the next four hours.  Would you like to reserve a room around 4pm?”

“Can I see the sheet?”

“I can tell you exactly what we have available and I’d be happy to make a reservation for you, if you’d like.”

“Is this going to be a problem?”


“Can’t I just look at the sheet?!?”

“Well, I just told you what we have available.  Would you like to make a reservation?”

It went on like this for a while.  LibraryDiva had been standing at the desk when he first walked up but disappeared part way through the exchange, telling me later that she had to stop herself from laughing.

I mean, seriously.  I couldn’t tell if dude was going to cry or throw a temper tantrum.

But either way, Mr. Suave was acting like a two-year-old.

Mr. Suave isn’t so suave anymore.

Saturday morning was my Contracts final and the official end to this official hell of a first semester.

The final itself was surprisingly easy.  Ok, not easy, but easier than I expected and definitely easier than the midterm was for me.  And that, my friends, scares me.

Why does it scare me?  Well, I felt like I was in a panic during almost every single Contracts class because I never quite felt like I grasped everything.  But finals rolled around… I studied quite a bit for a couple of weeks and I really “crammed” the night before.  Even so, I probably didn’t study as much as many of my classmates and I definitely wouldn’t have called myself an expert.  But I walked into school Saturday morning feeling relatively at ease.  I went through my notes a couple more times and then when he gave us the exam, I started right in.

I probably missed an issue here or there.  Honestly, though, as long as I at least get a C in Contracts, I’ll be happy.

LARW, now, is a different story.  While I didn’t spend a lot of time on my last Memo, I still think I did pretty well.  Or pretty ok, anyway.  And I’m half-way expecting a fairly decent grade.  I’ll be disappointed if I get a C there.

We’ll see.  At the latest, I’ll know my grades by January 4th.  That’s almost an entire month away, though, so for now, I’m simply trying to concentrate on catching up on sleep.  (I got NINE hours last night!!–I can’t tell you the last time that happened.)  Sleep, pleasure reading, tv, movies… lots of mindless, relaxing activities.

If only I could take a month off from work, too.

Also, sometimes law school has a culture of Freak the Hell Out, and you just get carried away in it.
Thanks, But No Thanks

Um.  Yes.  Freak the Hell Out, party of one, right here.


The search for automatic enlightenment after outlining is like the search for a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. I can’t find it.
i don’t wear skinny jeans

Outlining was going so well for about 5 minutes.  No, but really, I had one hardcore Friday night in the library where I felt so on top of things and Contracts was really coming together for me with the outline.  Then, no more.


Is it normal that I’m still completely lost in Contracts? . . . . Will I have a eureka moment for this class . . . . ? Surely I will, right?
law school ninja

I’m still waiting for that eureka moment.  I desperately need for it to grace me with its presence some time within the next two weeks.  The sooner, the better.  K?  Thanks.


I guess it was only a matter of time. I’ve officially turned into one of those people who randomly pull up cases on Lexis-Nexis for the hell of it.

I do that at work occasionally.  I’m glad I’m not the only nerd 😉


Pre-Made Outlines: You are smarter and pithier than my professor, and you never humiliate me, therefore my adoration never ends.
My Legal Fiction

Given that my professor spent half of the class telling non-related stories, study aids & outlines are going to be my new best friends.


…This is why finals season feels like a SAW sequel: how much are you willing to give to stay alive? An arm? A leg? Your right toe? Dum dum dum…

My sanity?


Last night Yesterday was a marathon.

Normally we have Contracts Wednesday night for an hour and Thursday night for two hours.  In an effort to conserve trips for everyone, as our LARW class is over, the professor agreed to combine Wednesday & Thursday this week, resulting in a marathon of Contracts last night.

This was bad for two reasons.

First of all, 3 straight hours of contracts is never a good thing.  NEVER.

Second, today is the opening of the New Moon movie.  (Yes, I am one of those people, I admit it)  so last night/this morning  was the midnight show.  It was awesome but please forgive me as I complain a little bit.  The last 24 hours for me has consisted of:

-Worked until 3:45 yesterday (like every other day)
-“Read” for Contracts and had a snack
-Class from 6:30-9:30 (he actually let us go at 9!  Was so excited!)
-Stopped at home to drop off things
-Met LibraryDiva for dinner & caffeine
-Got in the RIDICULOUS line at the theater around 11

-Watched the amazing movie with Lit.Lady and her friend–they got there before us, so they saved us seats!! 🙂
-Got home around 2:45am.  Asleep by about 3.
-Woke up this morning at 6.
-Stayed in warm, cozy bed until 6:15.
-Rushed around house & was out door by 6:30am.
-Got to work and sat at desk with Lit.Lady.  We gushed about the movie for a while.  Then spent next half hour laughing & grunting like Beavis & Butthead because we were too tired to do anything else.  When LibraryDiva got to work at 7:30, she came up to visit.  Between the three of us, we got a full night’s sleep.

I think we’ve all hit a wall.  We hit it at about 8 this morning.  Three hours of sleep just doesn’t cut it.  LibraryDiva & I just left to take something across campus & then to get lunch at Chipotle.  Today was definitely a Chipotle day.

By the time I make it home this evening, I’m going to be more than ready to crash.

But it was worth it.

And now I’m done with class–CRAZY–that fact was honestly a bit overshadowed by the movie.  But it’s very strange to think about.  I know I’ve said it before but this semester has gone by so quickly.  It’s so hard to believe that I’ve almost made it through my first semester of law school.  In two weeks, after the Contracts final, it will officially be over and we’ll get a break.  Looking forward to that more than I can express.

Best of luck to all the other law students out there as the semesters near the end!

I finished my lunch a little while ago & it was a very productive lunch hour, indeed.  I spent the entire time looking at Masters programs in English.

I know, I know…We need lawyers with a literary flair, as TDot said.  But I’m just not sure that I’m that person.  Maybe I’ll leave it up to Jansen.  We’ll see.

I haven’t made any definite decisions yet, by any means.  And I will certainly finish out the year here (assuming they let me).  My thought right now is that I’ll apply for the grad school some time at the beginning of next semester.  I’ll stick with these silly law school classes at least until the end of Spring semester.  By that time, if I haven’t been inspired…if I don’t have some sort of a definite law-related goal, then it might just be time for a change.  Like they say, it’s a woman’s prerogative to change her mind.  Right?

I mean, I was sitting there looking at the required classes for a Master of Arts Degree in English – Composition and they actually sounded interesting!  Every single one was something that I could picture myself really enjoying.  While that’s possibly a case of the grass-is-always-greener syndrome, Linguistics is more interesting to me than Contracts any day of the week.

Again, let me say–this is not definite.  This is just something I’m thinking about.  Seriously.  (Seriously, it’s just something I’m thinking about and it’s something I’m seriously thinking about.)

So my question is this:  IF I decide to go in a different direction next year, and I must change my tagline (to something like “English nerd turned law student, returns to English..?), will I still be able to keep company with those lovely law students out there?  Of course I couldn’t call my blog a blawg–or even a quasi-blawg, but I suppose I’ll have to cross that bridge if or when the time comes.


[Edited 11/17/09 @ 7:50 pm]
P.S.  I fully appreciate the irony of this post after just having posted Quitter? less than a month ago.  However, IF I do decide to leave law school, it will be to do something different…Not just to quit.  So there.

Why is it that I can be completely exhausted all day at work but then I get home…and I’m wide awake?  Not awake enough that I actually read any of the assigned cases (OH!  Wait!  I did read 2 cases!  …Out of *ahem* 11 *cough*).  No.  But just enough that I can’t fall asleep…  So instead of going to sleep at a decent time, I sit up in bed and watch alternating episodes of Friends and Whose Line.




I have to be at work at 6:45am and a normal person would see 10 o’clock or 11 o’clock roll by and think, Hey!  I should get some sleep! But me?  Yeah, not so much.

They have pills for this right?

Photo by rodrigo senna

Just kidding.  Mostly.

But actually, now that I think about it…I kind of wonder if the administrators at my school have programmed me to expect some sort of…issue.  When I first went to an open-house, during the week of the “Academic Success Initiative,” during orientation week, and then at least twice during the semester, that I’m aware of–they keep having this little talk with us about how law students (and lawyers) are prone to depression, alcoholism, etc., etc.. And I’m not denying the statistics that they throw at us, as I’m sure they’re very real, but part of me wonders if by continuing to remind us about all of these wonderful services for all of our wonderful problems, if they aren’t also inadvertently….giving us ideas?  Putting these fears into our heads which then become self-fulfilling prophecies?

Don’t worry.  I’m not depressed.  And I’m not an alcoholic.  I might be going a little bit crazy, but that’s nothing new.

So…insomnia, anyone?

Photo by Jsome1

I have one class left.  Wait.  Let me say that again…ONE CLASS.  One class, this Thursday evening, from 6:30-9:30.  Then, that’s it.  I will have finished my first semester as a law student.

Well, after the final, I will have finished.


I turned in my Memo for LARW yesterday.  That class is officially over for this semester.  No more class.  The third and final Memo counts as our entire grade for the class, with the other assignments that we’ve done throughout the semester being Pass/Fail.

Thursday is a marathon of Contracts and then that class is over.  The final isn’t until December 5th so I literally have 2 weeks to prepare for it.  The holiday next week is definitely working in my favor for that class.  Normally we have class Wednesday & Thursday night.  Next Wednesday, the University shuts down at 5 so classes after that are canceled.  No classes on Thursday of course, with Thanksgiving.  Thus, an extra week to prepare for the final.

That’s either going to be a really good thing or a really bad thing.  Good, hopefully, as I know there is a lot of material that I don’t know yet and two weeks will give me enough time to go over everything.  Bad, I fear, as I may work myself to death and completely freak out in the process.  Two weeks is a long time to study for something when you’ve made it a practice your whole life to not study for exams.  hmf.

No634 just summed up everything I’ve been thinking since…well, since before I even decided to apply to law school.

People ask me what I want to do and despite the fact that I’m in law school, what I really want to do is write.  And I’m not talking about legal memos.

Don’t get me wrong…Most days I feel like I’m doing the right thing [for now].  That I’m in the right place [for now].  But being some hardcore litigator is not part of the plan.  I’m interested in animal rights and environmental law but honestly, I don’t know how much good I can do there without being a litigator.  The only thing that I can visualize myself doing (law-related) at this point in my career is some sort of legal research gig.  Perhaps working for a company like Lexis or Westlaw.  I don’t know though.

We’ll see….